The Shift That Helped Me Lead from Rest (Not Performance)

Too many high-performing leaders hit their goals and still feel drained. If you’ve built success but can’t seem to slow down without guilt, this episode is for you.

I sat down with Ari Williams, a bold and refreshing voice in Christian music and author of The Boundless Mind, to explore what happens when performance becomes our default mode. Ari shares her story of leading worship, writing, and serving, until her pace landed her in a hospital room. That moment changed everything.

In this conversation, we unpack how to lead from rest, not from exhaustion; the mindset shift that frees you to scale your impact without sacrificing your health, your family, or your peace. You’ll hear practical insights on stewarding your energy, managing the pressure to perform, and renewing your mind for sustainable growth.

If you’re ready to lead from overflow instead of depletion, this episode will help you make that shift; from running on empty to leading with intention, clarity, and rest.

📚 Books Mentioned

• The Boundless Mind by Ari Williams
  
  
• Permission by Dr. Jackie Green

To learn more from Ari and explore her message of freedom and rest, visit theempoweredvoiceacademy.com — you can even download a free copy of The Boundless Mind.

Join Dr. William Attaway on the Catalytic Leadership podcast as he shares transformative insights to help high-performance entrepreneurs and agency owners achieve Clear-Minded Focus, Calm Control, and Confidence.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Meet Ari Williams
• 1:16 Leadership Calling and Church Roles
• 2:52 Prophecy to Pen: Becoming an Author
• 4:06 The Boundless Mind: Themes and Purpose
• 6:06 People-Pleasing and Performance Traps
• 8:45 Anxiety, Health Scares, and Awakening
• 11:12 Stewarding Body, Mind, and Spirit
• 13:05 Exposure, Small Steps, and Neuroplasticity
• 15:19 Choosing Freedom and Sustaining Growth
• 17:09 Humility, Obedience, and Leading Forward
• 18:38 Recommended Reading and Staying Connected
• 21:31 Closing Thanks and Resources

Transcript

Dr. William Attaway: 0:00

It is a joy today to have Ari Williams on the podcast. Ari is a bold and refreshing voice in the world of Christian music, contemporary gospel, and rhythm and praise music. Whether on stage, in the studio, or leading worship, Ari's mission is clear to share her authentic relationship with Christ in a way that resonates with people from all walks of life. Her debut studio album, Concrete Gardens, released in 2018, beautifully encapsulates her story. Nothing's supposed to grow out of concrete because the environment isn't conducive for growth. That's how she feels her life was set up to be. But with God's help, she has blossomed despite the odds. Like the flowers you find in a concrete garden. Ari's also an author with a book that shares her prayer life, another book about her experience with deliverance from mental strongholds, with both encouraging others on their faith journeys. She wants people to know they are not alone. Life with Christ is real. It has struggles and it has triumphs, but it's worth it. Ari, I'm so glad you're here. Thanks for being on the show. Thanks for having me. This is going to be a great conversation.

Intro: 1:16

Welcome to Catalytic Leadership, the podcast designed to help leaders intentionally grow and thrive. Here is your host, author, and leadership and executive coach, Dr. William Attaway.

Dr. William Attaway: 1:42

How did you get started?

Ari Williams: 1:43

That was a God thing because I never really saw myself as a leader. I would say within the past year, the Lord put me on this journey of developing as a leader, right? So he had me stop singing for a while and then he had me join this group, like a small group type setting. And I didn't know what the topic was going to be about. I'm like, God, I don't even know why I'm doing this. And it was about leadership. And I was like, well, why am I in here? I'm nobody's leader. Did not see myself that way at all. And so throughout this past year, he has been like really calling me to the forefront, putting me in places where I am in a leadership role. Like I do small groups at my church with the youth. So it's like a teaching role, a leadership type of role. So it's not just I was so used to leading worship and then kind of disappearing because I had a little social anxiety. So now like being immersed in the church culture and like getting to know the kids and getting to know their parents and being a voice in their life where they can see Jesus up close and personal has been uh the culmination of where I am today.

Dr. William Attaway: 2:50

I love that. So the writing journey, you know, normally when I think about somebody who is a gifted worship leader, a gifted singer, like you are, I don't equate that with somebody who wants to write books and to touch people in that way. How did that journey go?

Ari Williams: 3:07

Okay, so in 2019, the Lord had sent a couple of people into my life to prophesy to me about writing books. Now, I didn't really get a lot of awards growing up outside of for writing, but I had always discounted that as like that's not like a trophy. It would normally be a certificate. So I thought certificate was not as important as a trophy. So I was like, what am I gonna write about? So I just spent years just journaling random things that never came to it didn't come to anything. So I just kind of stopped pursuing that and went on about my business. Um, and then I would say within the past year, yeah, a lot has happened in the past year. Within the past year, like I was at um at the gym, I had started, you know, the Lord had been on me about teaching me how to take care of my body, you know, how to I had to drop some weight and just get on my health kick. And so while I was in the sauna just relaxing, I had a vision of the boundless mind. And so I didn't know what that was about. So when I saw it, I'm like, the boundless mind, like, what is that? And so I went home, made the cover, and that was that. And then he started giving me like the urge to like start writing and about certain things. Like he would highlight things that I would hear or just you know, in my everyday life to write about. And that's how the book came about. And I was like, oh, so back when you spoke this, when I was in the middle of getting free from all these cycles, I was living out the story you wanted me to write about. Got it. That's why it didn't happen back then.

Dr. William Attaway: 4:46

There you go. It's a journey. You know, there's so many times that I have looked at at different points of my journey and thought, man, why isn't this going faster? Why isn't this happening? You know, everything seems to be pointing this direction, but there's no momentum. What's going on here? And right as I look back with hindsight, hindsight's 2020, we have the opportunity to learn I wasn't ready yet. God was God was growing me in that season. Absolutely. I just didn't know what was happening. But there is no wasted experience. You know, this is something that I often tell the leaders that I work with, you know, even the things that are the lowest parts of your journey, even the things that you think are wasted time, are not. Because those experiences can be used later for your benefit or for the benefit of those around you.

Ari Williams: 5:38

That's right.

Dr. William Attaway: 5:38

You know, as I was reading The Boundless Mind, so many thoughts popped up. You know, you're a gifted writer and understanding as you start with apathy and the danger that is apathy, how how so many people are asleep in that state. And you write about so many of these different pieces of the journey when it when we're moving toward a mind that is unshackled. Was your own journey really the inspiration for all of this? Or were there other people that you looked at and thought, oh my goodness, as they're moving toward freedom, I'm seeing a I'm seeing threads that run through so many of their stories?

Ari Williams: 6:19

I think it was both. Like at first, I thought I was alone in all of those cycles, and then I started seeing similar patterns around me in the people around me. And so I was like, well, maybe it's not just me who has felt apathetic or been bound by self-doubt or stuck in survival mode anxiety. Like I started to see it like in everyone else's life, and I was like, okay, well, what's the point of having a story if you don't share it and it use it to help people? So I was like, okay, Lord, I'm a very private person. So I was like, I didn't feel comfortable sharing all of that vulnerable information with the world. But if it's going to help people, if it's going to draw people to Christ, if that was the whole reason I was born to draw people through my story, then why not utilize that and help someone else achieve freedom?

Dr. William Attaway: 7:07

That's really the theme of the book, isn't it? It's freedom, it's getting free of those chains, those shackles that bind so many of us so often of our own making.

Ari Williams: 7:18

Right.

Dr. William Attaway: 7:18

So your chapter, people pleasing, really made me chuckle because that is something that I had wrestled with very early on and still have a temptation toward. You know? And I loved your I loved your subtitle. You ain't gotta be everybody's favorite. That's so good. But boy, is that something I see a lot of leaders struggle with. What is your journey through that look like? Has that been something you've always struggled with? And how did you discover the freedom that you write about?

Ari Williams: 7:47

Well, I think yes, it was something that I've always struggled with because I briefly talked about my origin story where I was raised by a single mother, my dad wasn't there, and so I was just left kind of struggling with why was my family dynamic not the same as the core family supposed to be. And so that led me down a path of trying to get the affirmation that I needed, which every child needs from the father figure, from their mother. It led me down a path of trying to get that by being the token person, by being the one who's always dependable, by always showing up, no matter how much of a deficit that it left me in. But I learned through that process of going through that, hey, this is self-destructive. Me doing this to my deficit is not healthy. And so I just had to wake up to that. What was the second part of the question?

Dr. William Attaway: 8:37

Like, as you as you were moving toward freedom with this, like what were the steps along that pathway? Because this is something I see a lot of people struggle with. And what you just said about pleasing other people to your deficit, you know, man, that's that's so common. I see a lot of leaders trying to pour out of an empty pitcher because they're not taking the time to fill their own cup before they try to fill somebody else's.

Ari Williams: 9:03

Well, here's what I've learned. After going through this pattern of just being exhausted from doing all this, it just became like a sense of awareness that began to awaken as I was trying to constantly do that. And it got to a point to where it was causing anxiety. All these patterns were kind of linked together. And so it had got so bad to where my blood pressure was out of control. And then they couldn't figure out why it was high when I had no blockages, no high cholesterol. I was vegan at the time. I had lost about 20 pounds. So it didn't make sense. And they determined that it was because my body was stuck in fight or flight, which is anxiety, the anxiety state, the survival mode state. And so once I realized, like, dang, this is having an impact on my physical health, like I had to ask the Lord, can you reveal what I am holding on to that's still causing me to stay in this state? Like, why am I not able to calm down when I'm doing all the deep breathing? Like, it's because there's something internally that is causing me to feel like I still have to perform. And so the step was that awareness and then making a step to change it and allowing the Holy Spirit to reveal what was going on in my subconscious mind. And when he started to do that, I had to also like be humble and vulnerable and make the changes that needed to be made so that I could remain healthy because my longevity is an important part of me achieving my purpose and allowing me to be able to do that for a longer period of time. And I also found in my research that a lot of people like in the past were like generals of the faith. They had heart issues, they had all these health problems because they were so focused on serving God's people that they were not good stewards of their body. And I didn't want to fall into that same cycle. I wanted to do it from a place of, okay, let me make sure that I'm filled to capacity with the Lord. And then what I give to other people is from my overflow, not what I need for me and what I need for my family and what I need for the people who are actually doing life with me. So I'm very conscious now of making sure I'm I'm serving from a place of rest and not from a place of performance. And it is my goal to only operate from a place of being in his presence and not going back to that performance thing, that achievement achievement thing. And sometimes I'm still tempted to kick into that year and then I remember in a human vessel, you got to slow down, you know?

Dr. William Attaway: 11:30

So that's so well said. I really hope the leaders who are listening have paid attention to that. What you're describing is intentionality in running your race in a healthy and sustainable way. I watch a lot of leaders who are running so fast, so hard, that they are on the fast track to burnout. And burnout is not a badge of honor. Burnout is something we want to avoid as leaders because it affects how we lead. Actually, it will affect how we lead for the rest of our lives. You're talking about a healthy and sustainable pace as you run, so that you're not pouring out what is needed to keep you healthy, but you're working out of an overflow. You're sharing the overflow. That is so good and so healthy. And I have to think that comes out of part of your story too. I have to think that there were times when you didn't do that and it taught you the value of it. Would that be right?

Ari Williams: 12:22

Yes. I landed myself in the hospital room and I noticed, man, I'm the only one in here. All the people that I was helping and serving were nowhere to be found. And my family was at home. It was in the middle of COVID, so like they couldn't be there. So I was alone. So I'm like, man, I'm always serving my family. I'm always serving my kids, I'm always serving the church or serving all these people. That did have people check on me. I'm not gonna say that. But I was alone in the room. And like, when we are a bad steward of our body, we are the ones who have to pay the consequence of that, regardless of how many people love us. And I have a response, we all have a responsibility to be good stewards of everything God gives us, including our physical body, including our mental health, including paying attention to what's going on, you know, underneath our our conscious mind. Because a lot of times we don't realize that the subconscious mind is what drives our decision making. It drives our behaviors. And sometimes we do things that we don't know why we're doing them until we slow down and we're introspective and we allow the Holy Spirit to reveal what is going on so that he can uproot and heal and mend and, you know, allow that neuroplasticity to happen where we have new neuropathways, you know, so we're not automatically defaulting to anxiety or survival mode or apathy in order to preserve energy. Like there are healthier ways to manage life and to manage stress. Um, and the key to that is rest.

Dr. William Attaway: 13:52

You draw a very close connection between the freedom and that comes with stewarding your body and your health well and the freedom of your mind, what you call the boundless mind. What what what connected those two things for you?

Ari Williams: 14:09

Well, in the middle of 2019, when I was still in all these cycles, um, and mind you, it's been a long journey of getting free from those things. Um, in the Mac Dab in the middle of it, I was trying to lose weight for the first time, for real, after having kids. And there were a lot of mental barriers that I ran into when working out. And so my husband was trying to train me, but it's like I had so many things holding me back in my mind that it was hindering my performance. Like I didn't think I could run. I thought I was too big to run. Um, I thought everyone was looking at me. I was afraid to go to the gym because I thought people being like, oh, she's so big, why is she in here? I was so self-conscious about if I don't do something right and I look strange trying to perform, you know, the deadlifts and all the different um workouts. So I noticed that dang, the only thing standing between me and achieving having good health were these thoughts. If those thoughts changed, if what I believed about myself changed, then my results would be different. But every time I would just keep hitting this mental barrier every time. And it's like it just kept hindering me. And so it was a progressive journey, kind of like exposure therapy. Like, okay, let me try walking and then jog for 30 seconds and then walk again. And then I had to work myself what all the way up to being able to run for the full two minutes. You know what I'm saying? Or when I went to the gym for the first time, I had to like, let me just show up consistently walking on the treadmill for 30 minutes. Okay, once I got that, then I was like, okay, let me gain the nerve and the confidence to actually go on a class without feeling self-conscious because I don't know the movements. Like I felt like everyone was gonna be looking at me. And so I was just so self-conscious about that. But it took a year of me just going and doing the treadmill. And then now I walk in any class, whether I know the movements or not, but it took all those little small steps to get there. Um and each small step, I was overcoming a thought pattern. I was overcoming um a bound a chain of bondage that was holding me back from actually achieving what I really wanted, which was to be healthy.

Dr. William Attaway: 16:24

So good. You know, the leaders that I work with so often have chains that are holding them back. Learning how to break those chains is a journey. And I love that you use that imagery. This is a process. This did not just you didn't wake up one day and say, Oh my goodness, I'm free. I don't know how that happened, but I've got healthy thoughts now. Nobody touched that. You had to work for it. You had to do the work to get from where you were to where you are. So that's a process. And that process of moving from bondage to freedom is going to look different for different people. You know, for some people, it may be around physical health. For some people, it's those recurring soundtracks, like John A. Cuff calls them, those recurring thoughts in your head where you talk to yourself in a way that you'd never talk to somebody else. What you write about in the book is how to look at yourself as a fully integrated person, where all the parts touch all the other parts and lead to freedom. That is refreshing, and I gotta be honest, it's pretty unique. I don't hear a lot of people talking about that, about a holistic view of you. It's very refreshing, and I really want to commend that to the listeners. If you have not read The Boundless Mind, I really want you to take a look at this. I want you to see it, I want you to read it, and I want you to take it to heart. Ari, as you were writing this, I imagine you had in mind the people who would one day read it. What were you thinking about when you think about the people who would be the the readers of this book eventually?

Ari Williams: 18:01

I was just hoping that my story would help them to be awakened from their slumber for them to realize that they can do something about these bondages. They can come out of agreement with these things. I wanted to empower them and to let them know that they can be free, that freedom is possible. And Jesus is how He is the possible, He's the one who makes it possible. And so I just wanted to be a witness to his power to deliver and to set free.

Dr. William Attaway: 18:33

So good. I really want that message to ring loud and clear. It is possible. You know, when you are wrapped in those chains, it's very easy to fall into the lie and listen to that lie that you can never be free. That there's no way out. Right. That it will always be like it is today. But that's not true. And what you write about in the book is the path from where you are to where you could be. But you have to choose right. So if we could sum up your journey, I'm I'm just curious. I'm thinking about you as a leader, and you are a leader. You have influence, and that influence extends through the songs that you sing, it extends through the books that you write, the talks that you give as you speak. These are opportunities that you have to extend that influence and leverage that for the good of the people around you, helping them to discover the freedom that God created them for. As I think about you, I think about somebody who, like me and everybody else I know, is a work in progress. So I'm going to ask you this question with that in mind. How do you stay on top of your game? How do you level up with the new leadership skills that are going to be required of you in the years to come?

Ari Williams: 19:49

I stay on my face before the Lord. And I'm not just saying physically, but like it requires a level of humility and being willing to surrender over and over again. Even writing writing the book was fine. But then when the Lord started pressing me to like promote the book, I started to hit that mental barrier, like self-doubt, you know. But I was able to go past that barrier because I already knew the route out. I needed to come out of agreement with every lie of the enemy and just choose to obey and not have my faith attached to the outcome, but have my faith attached to who God is. And he is the chainbreaker. He is the one who is the deliverer. He is the one who is the healer. He's the great physician. He is everything that we need. And so if he wants to use my voice and my story, whether it be through song, through being a small group leader, through teaching, through writing a book, however that looks, I'm willing to be obedient. And I'm also aware of my lack and my inability to do certain things. So I'm I'm leaning heavy, heavily on him to be the voice through me. Like use my mouth, use me as an instrument, Lord, to reach the people that you want to reach. So I stay on top of my game by staying in a place of humility and surrender.

Dr. William Attaway: 21:11

So well said. You know, you're a continual learner who wants to continue to grow beyond where you are today. Is there a book that has made a big difference in your journey that you would recommend to the leaders who are listening? Hey, if you haven't read this, this made a big difference for me.

Ari Williams: 21:27

Permission by Dr. Jackie Green. She's Travis Green's wife, and they have a church out in South Carolina. Um, and she has a com a permission conference. Um, and she wrote a book called Permission, and that book really, really made a difference in my life.

Dr. William Attaway: 21:42

I've not read that. Now I'll have to check that one out. Thank you. Ari, I know our listeners are gonna want to stay connected to you and continue to learn more from you and about your writing and the books that you have. What's the best way for people to stay in touch with you?

Ari Williams: 21:57

You can get your free copy of The Balanced Mind at the Empowered VoiceAcademy.com. There you can get all the information you need about the book and about me, all there.

Dr. William Attaway: 22:09

Perfect. We will have that link in the show notes, along with links to your social connections so people can follow you and continue to learn from you. Ari, thanks so much for your time and your generosity today and sharing so freely from what you've learned so far in your journey. And I can't wait to see what's next for you.

Ari Williams: 22:29

Thank you for having me.